A real Caribbean Rum Punch is something you just can’t get when not on an island in the Caribbean. I’ve had some great ones on previous trips to the Bahamas, the BVI, but never in the States. In the US, rum punch always equals some sugary, cough-syrupy nastiness.
Rum Punch is to the Atlantic Isles what Mai Tais are to the Pacific, and just as veiled in culinary mystery. And, unfortunately, just as many awful ones are sold for ghastly amounts of money.
By using some careful and sleuthy powers of observation (I claimed to be waiting for a glass of water! Ha!) I witnessed the creation of an authentic one on an island, on a beach, and at a bar in the Bahamas. And previous experimentation at this particular establishment ensured that this would be a good one.
“The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy also mentions alcohol. It says that the best drink in existence is the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster. It says that the effect of drinking a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster is like having your brains smashed out by a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick.
The Guide also tells you on which planets the best Pan Galactic Gargle Blasters are mixed, how much you can expect to pay for one and what voluntary organizations exist to help you rehabilitate afterwards. The Guide even tells you how you can mix one yourself.”
—Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
Is the rum punch the East Coast equivalent of the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster? Perhaps, but we won’t know until we conquer the stars and find the real deal.
Dulcinea’s Bahamian Rum Punch Recipe
I have modified the recipe slightly (and full disclosure, I only witnessed half of the process at the aforementioned bar due to the bartenders’ equally careful and sleuthy powers).
So without further ado or alliteration, I give you my take on the authentic Bahamian Caribbean Island Rum Punch:
- 1 oz. coconut rum
- .5 oz. gold rum
- .5 oz. vodka (vanilla vodka is good here, but it’s optional)
- 2 oz. orange/pineapple juice (or 1 oz orange and 1 oz pineapple…)
- Splash of cranberry juice, cranberry cocktail, or grenadine (mostly for color)
- Squeeze of fresh lime
Serve over ice and enjoy. Authentically served in a Mason jar. Be careful in the dinghy afterwards, and even more careful when tying the dinghy’s painter off when you get back to the boat.
Notes and Details about the Rum Punch
Ok, but that’s not the whole story — that’s just the gist. The fact of the matter is that there’s one secret to making this recipe that we’ve never been able to duplicate anywhere in the States: getting the right rum.
You see, coconut rum here is frankly quite disgusting. In the Bahamas, there’s a brand of local rum called Ricardo, and that’s the stuff you want to use for this recipe.
There are a few other treats you can only get in the Bahamas that help, too. In most Bahamian markets, you can find shelf-stable tins of fruit juice on the juice aisle. We like the Blue Bird brand. They’re really handy on the boat, since they last for a long time and don’t need space in the fridge — the perfect Bahamas provisions. I’ve witnessed many bars using these same tins to make their rum punches, so it’s an extra authentic touch.
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